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Sunday, September 30, 2007

Slowing Things Down 

So after trying for a while to convince myself it was a bad idea and then telling everyone I know who might try to talk me out of it (so they could, but of course they didn't) I've decided to take two years instead of one to finish at CBC.

I've realized I'm pushing myself too hard at school. This quarter I'm taking Chemistry, Technical Writing and Calculus and I feel like I'm just barely staying afloat. Chemistry has a lab and I've signed up to take a second optional lab in order to get some real live lab experience (and because they project we will be doing is VERY COOL!!). Technical writing is actually a pretty straightforward class but Calculus and Chemistry are already giving me headaches and it's only the second week.

Next quarter I had been planning to take Calculus, Chemistry and Physics (which would also have a lab). I really think I would have ended up dropping out next quarter because I think ultimately I would have been overwhelmed. So I've decided to stretch the classes I need to take out into two years. This year I will focus on Math and Chemistry and next year I will focus on Physics and Biology. I think this will be less stressful and allow me to do better in those classes. Hopefully I won't come to hate the Tri-Cities SO MUCH that I give up on school completely and run off to Seattle without a degree...

I do feel a little like I'm giving up on a goal. Slacking. But I'm really not.

I'm less focused this quarter for sure though. In the spring I had Travis here which gave me a lot more freedom as far as my time. Now I don't have that plus I've become a lot more social both at school and at my apartment complex which kinda splits my focus. Damn friends!!

Oh well I will persevere.

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Thursday, September 20, 2007

Old 

I'm starting to feel old. The grey hairs aren't helping. Being old isn't all bad. In some ways it's actually pretty cool. For one thing I get to feel smug and superior to a lot of the teenagers I go to school with. So while they are still there as a constant reminder of just how old I am, they also furnish me with the chance to look down on someone.

But here's what has me feeling old now. I'm in Chemistry. The pre-rec for this class is that you have either taken Chem 101 (which I haven't) or had high school chem with a grade of 2.0 or better. I must have because no one questioned my entering this class. I don't remember what grade I got in high school chemistry. I only vaguely recall taking chemistry in high school at all. The fact is I was 15 when I took chemistry. I'm 30 now. I don't even need my current calculus class to realize that this means I took chemistry HALF A LIFETIME ago!! Sigh. See how old this makes me feel?

The truth is that this class is way over my head. I should really go back and take chem 101 before I take this class. But there isn't time. This is certainly a consequence of being old. So I will just work my ass off and make it work somehow.

I'm also in Technical Writing. Which is English 205. I took English 101 a million years ago too. The teacher is working under the assumption that we have all taken English 101 and therefore we are familiar with all of the online research options which you learn in 101. Needless to say I'm not. When I took English 101 we had the Internet but it wasn't yet considered a valuable research resource at least not valuable enough for them to teach us how to use it. So I'm going to be playing a lot of catch up this quarter. At least I feel relatively up to date in my Calculus class. And I got my adorable teacher back whom I love. never mind that he's YOUNGER than me... Sigh.

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