I had an epiphany of sorts today. I've always had a hard time making friends. I have really great close friends but the thought of making new friends seems completely absurd.

Today I realized what it is that seals the deal so to speak and helps me to form a good friendship with someone.

Repeated Exposure.

Preferable in small doses over a long period of time.

For example. Dawn is one of my closest friends. It's hard to pin down exactly when this happened though. I first became aware of Dawn's existence in Jr. High. She was in 8th grade and I was in 7th. I didn't really know her, or even her name for that matter. I remember her vividly although I never spoke to her.

There were several times during highschool when I got to know her a little better. Even went to her house on a couple occasions. Once for a party and once because I was sort of dating her cousin who was living there.

It wasn't until college when I really got to know Dawn, and we worked together at McDonalds. At one point she got kicked out of her house and she came and lived in my house for a while. It's weird because there was still so much I didn't know about her then. But in the years since then we've grown very close.

Odd to think she's played at least a minor roll in my life for 14 years!! wow!

I met Leanne in JrHigh as well. She was in my 'clique' because we were a bunch of people who didn't fit in anywhere else. But we hated eachother! We had a friend in common but Leanne and I weren't really friends at that point. Even up into highschool she was sort of a side character in my life. But once again through repeated exposure she and I because very good friends. And by the time she went off to college we were best friends.

Again I've known her for 14 years. Sheesh. I'm old!

Probably one of my newest friends is M'Ellen. But even though our friendship is pretty new, I have in fact known her for quite some time. She was the Leader at LaLeche League when I went when Kathrynn was a baby. That means I have known 'of' M'Ellen for 5 years. Almost two years ago now I ran into M'Ellen online on a registry for homeschoolers. We chatted a bit because we had both put that we were unschoolers. I think we exchanged a few emails before I realized she was someone I already sort of knew.

I imagine that in the last 14 years there were hundreds of people I met and thought I might hit it off with only to never see them again and not get the required repetition to create a friendship.

I guess my point is that things take time. If someone had told me when I first met any of these women that one day we would be very good friends I never would have believed them. In the same way if someone had told me the first time that I met my husband that I would be marrying him someday I would have laughed in their face!!

Life has a weird way of working out.